Dog on a lead

There once was a man, let’s call him Joe,

Who let others lead him wherever they’d go.

He’d nod and he’d follow, though deep down he knew,

That the life he was living was not really true.

With a leash ‘round his neck, like a dog in a park,

He followed their wishes from morning till dark.

His choices weren’t his, they were borrowed and bent,

From the weight of the dogma and rules others sent.

“Oh, you must do this!” and “You can’t do that!”

He was tied to opinions, like a cat to a mat.

He wanted to please, so he gave up his crown,

Till he noticed one day he was feeling run down.

But deep inside Joe, a voice softly spoke,

“You’re more than these chains, it’s time you awoke!

Your choices are yours, no leash should you bear,

Stand tall in your truth, with respect and self-care.”

So Joe, bit by bit, began to take heed,

And loosened that leash that he didn’t quite need.

With awareness in hand, and respect in his chest,

He found that his freedom was truly the best.

No longer a puppet to others’ demands,

He walked his own path with his heart in his hands.

And though he still cared, he had learned how to see,

That true love begins when you set yourself free.

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The Shaman’s Severance

The fire crackled in the heart of the circle, its tongues of flame licking at the void, casting shifting shadows upon the earth. Around it, time did not move as it once had. It stretched, coiled, bent upon itself like a serpent swallowing its own tail. I stood at the edge of it all, clad in the regalia of a thousand lives before me, feathers woven with forgotten prayers, beads strung with echoes of past selves. The wind whispered secrets through the hollow bones of my adornments, but I no longer needed to listen. I already knew. Before me lay the thread, the tether of lifetimes. It glowed with a sickly light, pulsing like a vein too long constricted. It led backward, into the past, where old wounds festered and repeated in the endless cycle of return. My name had been spoken in many tongues, but one thing remained constant, I had been bound. Bound to a story not my own. Bound to a presence that had long since decayed, yet refused to release its grip. I turned my gaze from the fire and faced the past. Shadows of my former selves flickered in the distance, chained together like ghosts of the same suffering. And behind them, the one who had clung to me across lifetimes, weaving herself into my lineage like a parasite burrowed into the roots of an ancient tree. She had walked in many forms, whispered from many mouths, played many roles. But always, the same force. The same gravity pulling me backward, away from the horizon that called me forward. No more. From my side, I lifted the hatchet. Not a mere blade, but a thing of will, a tool carved from intention itself. Its edge gleamed with the weight of decision, sharpened not by metal but by certainty. With one breath, I raised it. With another, I brought it down. The tether severed with no resistance, as if it had been waiting for this moment all along. And in that instant, the past unraveled. The false lineage, the illusory roots, the cyclic suffering, it all collapsed into nothingness, erased like an error in the great weave. I turned back toward the fire, toward the future, and felt the first breath of unchained air fill my lungs. My feet moved before thought could follow. And so I danced No longer as the bound, no longer as the haunted, but as the one who had cut the cord.

Number 1-9

According to Thoth  In the teachings of Thoth, particularly through the lens of Hermeticism and ancient Egyptian symbolism, numbers hold profound esoteric meanings. Here’s a brief overview of the symbolic meanings of numbers 1 to 9, drawing from Hermetic and Thothian traditions: 1. Unity (The Monad) Represents the One, the source of all things, and the divine essence. It is the beginning of creation and symbolizes the unity of all that exists. 2. Duality (The Dyad) Symbolizes balance and opposition—light and dark, male and female, positive and negative. It reflects the interplay between forces that create movement and change. 3. Harmony (The Triad) Represents synthesis and harmony, the joining of two opposites to create something new. It often symbolizes divine intelligence and the spiritual balance of the soul. 4. Foundation (The Tetrad) Associated with structure, stability, and the material world. It represents the four elements (earth, air, fire, water) and the four directions, creating the foundation upon which the universe stands. 5. Life (The Pentad) Symbolises life, growth, and transformation. In esoteric traditions, it is connected with the human being, often represented by the five-pointed star or pentagram, symbolizing spiritual and material harmony. 6. Balance (The Hexad) Represents balance and harmony between the material and spiritual realms. Six is often associated with creation, as it is said the universe was created in six days, and it denotes cosmic order. 7. Mystery (The Heptad) Symbolises mysticism, spiritual awakening, and inner wisdom. Seven is sacred and considered the number of spiritual initiation, reflecting cycles and completeness. 8. Power (The Ogdoad) Represents infinity, cosmic order, and regeneration. It symbolizes the eternal flow of energy and the balance between the spiritual and material worlds, often seen as a number of power and abundance. 9. Completion (The Ennead) Symbolizes completion and the highest level of attainment. In ancient Egyptian belief, the Ennead referred to the group of nine deities who ruled creation, thus representing the totality of existence. These interpretations, though rooted in ancient symbolism, reflect the broader Hermetic and mystical understanding of numbers as cosmic forces shaping reality and human consciousness. Further to this also according to Thoth there where the nine creator gods knows as the Ennead. The Ennead is a group of nine deities in ancient Egyptian mythology, primarily associated with the city of Heliopolis, where they were worshipped as the primary gods responsible for the creation and governance of the cosmos. The Ennead represents the process of creation and the fundamental aspects of existence, including life, death, order, and chaos. The Nine Gods of the Ennead are as follows: 1. Atum (or Ra-Atum) – The Creator Atum is the self-created god who brought the world into existence from the primordial waters of Nun. He is the sun god and the source of all creation. He is creation, life-giving, and ruler of the cosmos. Atum created the first divine couple through his own will, and his actions set the entire cosmic order in motion. 2. Shu – God of Air Shu is the god of air and light, separating the sky from the earth. He represents life-giving air and is crucial in maintaining the separation of the heavens and the earth. He has the ability to sustain life, control the atmosphere, and uphold cosmic order by separating the sky (Nut) from the earth (Geb). 3. Tefnut – Goddess of Moisture Tefnut is the goddess of moisture, dew, and rain. She complements Shu and together they form the basic principles of life—air and moisture. She is capable of governing rain, dew, and moisture, essential for life, fertility, and sustenance of the natural world. 4. Geb – God of the Earth Geb is the personification of the Earth. He is often depicted lying beneath the sky goddess Nut. Geb is associated with fertility, earthquakes, and the physical land. He had control over the earth and its fertility. He is responsible for growth, life, and vegetation, and his laughter was said to cause earthquakes. 5. Nut – Goddess of the Sky Nut is the goddess of the sky and the heavens, arching over the earth and representing the cosmic canopy. She swallows the sun every night and gives birth to it every morning. She governs the heavens, controls the cycles of the stars, and the rebirth of the sun each day. Nut is also associated with resurrection and the afterlife. 6. Osiris – God of the Underworld and Resurrection Osiris is the god of the underworld, the dead, and resurrection. He also represents fertility and the cycle of life, death, and rebirth. She has control over the underworld, judgment of the dead, and the ability to grant eternal life through resurrection. Osiris is often associated with renewal and agricultural growth. 7. Isis – Goddess of Magic and Motherhood Isis is one of the most important goddesses in Egyptian mythology, representing magic, healing, motherhood, and protection. She is also the wife of Osiris and the mother of Horus. Having mastery of magic, healing, protection, and the ability to resurrect and heal others. She was revered for her ability to protect her loved ones, particularly Horus, her son. 8. Seth (Set) – God of Chaos and Destruction  Seth is the god of chaos, the desert, storms, and disorder. He is often in conflict with the forces of harmony and order, notably his brother Osiris and his nephew Horus. He wields control over chaos, storms, and destruction. He represents the unpredictable forces of nature and is also associated with violence and conflict. Despite this, Seth is essential to balance and represents necessary chaos in the cosmic order. 9. Nephthys – Goddess of Mourning and the Night Nephthys is the goddess of mourning, night, and protection, often serving as a counterpart to Isis. Though her role is less prominent than other members of the Ennead, she is essential in rituals of death and mourning. She is associated with death rites, protection in the afterlife, and helping the dead transition peacefully. Nephthys is often invoked during funeral ceremonies alongside

Sorting Through Trauma

If you’re dealing with suspicions of infidelity or feeling mistrustful in your relationship, the first thing is to take a deep breath and try to sort through your emotions. It’s easy to let anger, sadness, or confusion take over, but understanding how you’re feeling and why is important. Ask yourself if your suspicions are based on something concrete or if they might come from insecurity or miscommunication. When you’re ready to talk to your partner, pick a calm moment. Don’t go into it angry or accusing because that will just make them defensive. Instead, share how you feel and ask questions without blaming. For example, say something like, “I’ve been feeling unsure about some things, and I want to understand better,” rather than jumping straight into accusations. If you’re really stuck and need clarity, focus on observing patterns rather than snooping or assuming the worst. If something doesn’t add up, it’s okay to ask about it directly. But remember, trust is fragile, and how you approach the situation matters a lot. Sometimes, these situations are too heavy to handle alone, and it’s worth considering therapy, either as a couple or for yourself. A therapist can help you figure out what’s really going on and whether the relationship can be rebuilt. If you feel overwhelmed, personal therapy can give you the tools to process what you’re going through and help you make decisions. At some point, you’ll have to step back and ask yourself if this relationship is giving you what you need. Are your values, needs, and boundaries being respected? If not, you’ll have to think about what you’re willing to forgive and what might be a dealbreaker for you. Either way, take care of yourself through this. Focus on things that make you happy and help you feel grounded, like spending time with friends, exercising, or diving into a hobby you love. Most importantly, remember that your worth doesn’t depend on how someone else treats you. If things feel too broken, it’s okay to move on. If there’s a way to fix things, it will take time and commitment from both sides. Either way, you’ve got this, and you deserve a relationship that feels safe and fulfilling.